Pickle Jar to implement 'dillicious' menu changes

Major updates are heading to the Pickle Jar this summer, says UNCSA Dining Services. After years of dill-igently providing the campus community with sandwiches, soups and salads, the Pickle Jar will be over-hauling the menu to focus on a single signature ingredient: pickles! 

That’s right, there will be something for everyone—from pickle smoothies in the morning to a Minnesota Pickle Dog for lunch. Pickle muffins, pickle butter on pickle bread and pickle ice cream (for those with a sweet tooth) will be featured on the revamped menu.

Beloved UNCSA mascot Peter the Pickle served as chief consultant for the menu. “Of course, we thought of the standard foods such as fried pickles and sandwiches with pickles, but we really wanted to think outside of the jar with this project,” said Peter.

April Fools Food Options

A few new menu items include Peter's Pickled Smoothie, Pickle Ice Cream and Eisenberg Dogs / Food styling: Carly Anders

Pickle smoothies were a personal invention of Peter’s. “I’m tired of the standard smoothie menu. I wanted to mix it up,” he said. “Tomatoes have V8®…why can’t we have smoothies?” 

We asked Peter if he felt like eating pickles was a form of cannibalism, but the mascot declined to comment. 

An anonymous source within Dining Services stated that the change was inspired by the students’ love of pickles: “Pickles are everywhere on our campus, from our posters and t-shirts to our hashtags. We felt that the pickle was drastically underrepresented in one major area: the food!” 

Thankfully, this oversight has been corrected with 53 new menu items to choose from, one for each year UNCSA has been open. I wanted to have 1,965 items but unfortunately I was vetoed, bemoaned Peter.

Our favorite new menu items

Breakfast
  • English Eggs (Pickled egg on toast)
  • Peter Pickled Smoothies
  • Caldwell Coffee
  • Ruskin Relish-Topped waffles
  • Pickle Jaffe Jam
  • Ferrell French Toast
Lunch / Dinner
  • Eisenberg Dogs (A giant pickle in a hot dog bun)
  • Bierman Paleo Pickled Tuna Salad
  • Beres BLTP (bacon, lettuce, tomato and pickle)
  • Zigler Zucchini & Pickle Lasagna
Dessert
  • Pandi Pickle Ice Cream
  • Cole Cheesecake with pickle topping 
  • Sanford Shake (strawberry and pickle milkshake)
  • Kelley Kiwi-Pickle Pie
  • Wilcox Pickled Watermelon Rind

 

To honor the history of UNCSA, several items are named for prominent members of the campus community, both past and present. Eisenberg Dogs (a giant pickle in a hot dog bun), English Eggs (pickled eggs on toast) and Caldwell Coffee (coffee with pickle juice creamer) are just a few examples. 

If this menu change goes well, we could be looking at more than just pickled cucumbers on the menu, says our source. “Pickled foods are everywhere these days, from onions to fish.” Giving us a sneak peek at what’s to come, the source leaned over and whispered, “Pickled onion Jell-O® is going to be the new avocado, I’m sure of it.”

by Melissa Upton

April 1, 2018 (April Fools’ Day)